Funny Going to Bed Without You
Sleep is one of life's greatest pleasures and so, why not make some jokes about sleep that will be the perfect bedtime humor?
It doesn't matter whether you are a sleepyhead or unable to sleep, funny bedtime jokes are for everyone. While funny sleep jokes are relatable with all the lazy and tired folks out there, lack of sleep jokes will strike the right chord with all insomniacs.
For those of us who love to sleep, we begin each day looking forward to the night when we can go back to bed. Sleep is perhaps the best form of relaxation after a long and exhausting day. But do you know what makes the unwinding better? Some witty and funny nighttime jokes! In fact, shouldn't there be a saying like, "A sleepy joke a night lets you sleep tight"? Well, while we wait for someone to make that viral, we can do with a sleep joke or two.
For more humor that isn't sleepy, take a looks at Sleep Puns and Morning Jokes.
Sleep Jokes That Won't Make You Drowsy
What's better than bedtime stories? Jokes about bedtime, of course! Our collection of nap jokes will make sure you have a good giggle before you go to bed! Had a long day? Our funny sleep jokes might help you relax!
1. Why did the little girl take her bicycle to bed with her? Because she didn't want to sleepwalk.
2. What should you do if you can't go to sleep? You lie on the bed's edge and soon you'll drop off.
3. What is huge, grayish, and can send people to sleep? A hypno-potamus.
4. Why does the man eat yeast and shoe polish before he goes to sleep? So that he can rise and shine.
5. Why did the man run around his bed? He wanted to catch up on his sleep!
6. Do you know at what time tennis players go to sleep? At ten-nish.
7. What do sheep count when they can't sleep? People.
8. What happens when you dream that you wrote 'The Lord Of The Rings?' You start Tolkien in your sleep.
9. How often should you sleep in a tower? Every fortnight.
10. What happens if you sleep on your smartphone? You download a nap.
11. When is the perfect time for the cattle to go to sleep? Pasture bedtime.
12. How will you prove that you are not a light sleeper? Go sleep in the dark.
13. Why did the girl take a ruler with her to bed? To see how long she sleeps.
14. How do you make a baby alien go to sleep? You rocket.
15. Where do all the books in the library crash at night? Under their covers!
16. Do you know which animal falls asleep with its shoes on? A horse.
17. Where do burgers go to sleep? On a bed of lettuce.
18. How do you stop sleepwalking? You stick drawing pins on the floor of the bedroom.
19. Why did the band's guitarist pass out on stage? Because he rocked himself to sleep.
20. How do baby bats learn to sleep upside down? They slowly get the hang of it.
21. What happens when you sleep on pillows with corduroy cases? They make headlines.
22. What do you call it when you sleep next to a close relative? Nap-kin.
Tired And Sleepy Jokes That Are Relatable
No matter how exhausted you are, we guarantee you that you'll never get tired of these tired jokes.
23. What do you call a sleepy truck? Tired.
24. What do you call a very sleepy egg? Eggs-hausted.
25. What is a sleepy dragon's favorite steak? A flaming yawn.
26. Which art supply will make you tired? A cra-yawn.
27. What do you do when someone is tired and doesn't know how to nap? You give them a crash course.
28. What do you do when you're tired of hearing someone's boring herb jokes? You tell them that it's thyme to stop.
29. What is it that's doubly tired? A bicycle!
30. Why do people get tired of Facebook? Because everyone is just so meme.
31. Where do tired people go to buy their food? A grocery snore.
32. What do you call a music concert with a tired audience? Lollapasnooza.
33. What do you call a tired herbivore? A Zzzzebra.
34. What do you call a conference with tired delegates? A snooze fest.
35. What happens to a man who runs behind a car? He gets exhausted.
36. Do you know why mountains are always tired? Because they don't Everest.
37. What do you call a person who is tired of playing card games? Cardboard.
38. Do you know why bicycles can't stand on their own? Because they are tired.
39. What would you call a skeleton that's very tired? A Grim Sleeper.
40. Why is it so tiring to fix a toilet? Because the work is draining.
Hilarious Jokes About Sleeping
Napping jokes are so funny that they're one of the most classic forms of sleeping humor. Which of these do you like the most?
41. What would you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer!
42. What would you call a sleeping pizza? A piZZZa!
43. What would you call a sleeping werewolf? An unaware wolf.
44. Why is sleeping so easy? Because you can do it with your eyes shut!
45. Why did the pharmacist tiptoe past the medicine cabinet? Because he didn't want to wake up the sleeping pills!
46. Do you know another word for a sleeping bag? It's a nap-sack!
Falling Asleep Jokes
Falling asleep as soon as you hit the bed has to be the best feeling! But still better are these clever jokes about falling asleep.
47. How do you make yourself fall asleep faster? You decorate your bedroom like a classroom!
48. How did the sheep bring herself to sleep? She counted her friends!
49. What do you call a woodcutter who fell asleep? A slumberjack.
50. What happened to the woman after she fell asleep with her head under the pillow? The fairies took all her teeth out!
51. What would you do if a dinosaur fell asleep on your bed? You go sleep somewhere else!
52. Do you know where all the fish fell asleep? On the seabed.
53. What happened when the boy fell asleep on a bed of sugar? He had sweet dreams.
54. What do you find butterflies asleep on? Caterpillows.
55. Why did the boy wake up with a puzzled look on his face? Because he fell asleep on a crossword.
56. Why are dragons asleep during the day? So that they can fight knights.
57. What can you do to prevent your feet from falling asleep? You wear loud socks.
58. What do you call it when your feet fall asleep and wouldn't wake up? Coma-toes.
Dream Jokes You Can Read While Awake
Dreams take us to a world unknown at night of which we can hardly make sense in the day. But you can sure cherish these sleep jokes about dreaming that are too funny!
59. What do you call it when you dream about a waterbody filled with orange soda? A Fanta-sea.
60. Do you know what kind of dreams hotels have? Suite dreams.
61. What happens when you dream of someone shouting "On your mark...get set..."? You wake up with a start!
62. Why won't I tell you about my dream that has a lion, a witch, and a wardrobe? Because it is Narnia business.
63. What do you call it when you get a movie role where you're paid to sleep? Your dream job.
64. What happened to the girl who was dreaming that she ate a huge marshmallow? She woke up to find half her pillow gone!
65. What do you call it when you dream in color? A pigment of your imagination.
66. How can you make your dreams clearer? Wear contact lenses to bed.
Insomnia Jokes For Sleepless Nights
Insomnia is awful but jokes about insomnia and can't sleep jokes are anything but bad. These sleep-deprived jokes will make it more evident.
67. Why are people with insomnia some of the coolest? Because they're up for anything.
68. What do you call a giant mammal of the bison family that dwells in the mountains but can't sleep? An insomni-yak.
69. What happens when you don't know whether you have insomnia or amnesia? You lose sleep trying to remember which one you have.
70. Why is insomnia not a joke? Because people are losing sleep over it.
71. What do you call a horse who has insomnia and keeps you awake? A nightmare.
72. Do you know what's common between insomnia and cashiers? They will both give you bags and make you wretchedly uncomfortable.
73. Why is insomnia considered to be illegal in many places? Because it amounts to resisting a-rest.
74. How do you confirm that you have insomnia? You know that the farmer has 897 sheep.
75. What do you call it when you keep eating while you can't sleep? Insom-nom-nom-nom-nom-nia!
76. What do you do with an elephant who has trouble sleeping? You give it a trunk-quilizer.
Bed And Mattress Jokes You Can Re-lie On
Here's our take on jokes about bed and funny go to bed jokes.
77. How does a man survive who's locked in a room with nothing but a bed and a calendar? He drinks water from the bed's springs and eats dates from the calendar.
78. What do you do when you see a bus with 100 lawyers stuck on a bed of quicksand? You let that sink in…
79. When does a bed become longer? At night, when two feet are added to it.
80. Which time of the year does a bed like the most? Spring break.
81. What do you call someone who climbs into your bed and asks very specific questions? An undercover cop.
82. What is Aaron Hernandez's favorite bit of a bedsheet? The tight end.
83. How do you write a story about your bed? You make it yourself.
84. What happens when you replace your bed with a trampoline without telling your wife? She hits the roof.
85. Why is Simba the last of the pride to get out of bed every time? Because he is a lie-in king.
86. What did Papa cow read to the baby cow before going to bed? Dairy tales.
87. Which is the best season for bed bugs to get married? The Spring.
88. Why is it difficult to get any specific information out of a bedding expert? Because they are always making blanket statements.
89. Where do lawyers go to buy a bed? A mattress firm.
90. What do you do when you're not sure if you like the new mattress you just bought? You sleep on it.
91. Why should you splurge on an expensive mattress for your bed? So that you can have your dream vacation.
92. Why should professional rock-climbers take a course in mattress making? So that they have something to fall back on.
93. What happens when you eat a memory foam mattress after a long time? You remember that they taste far better than traditional mattresses.
94. What do you call it when a king and queen size mattress has a baby? An heir mattress.
95. What happened when there was an arson at the mattress factory? The staff couldn't rest until they found the criminal.
Snoring Jokes For Sound Sleep
These sleeping jokes about snoring are rib-ticklingly funny!
96. What would you call a sleeping T-Rex? A dinosnore.
97. What do you call it when a mass of white wool snores on a field? A sleep.
98. What do you do when your pet poodle snores too much? You get a CPUP machine.
99. What do you call a rock band whose members are in deep sleep? Snore Patrol.
100. What do scuba divers wear when they go to sleep? A snore-kel.
101. What do you call a person who snores a lot? A sound sleeper.
102. What do you call a dessert made of Graham crackers, marshmallow, and chocolate? S'nores.
103. Which dinosaur makes the most noise while he is sleeping? A Tyrannosnorus.
Knock Knock Sleep Jokes
Our knock-knock jokes related to sleeping are great for some bedtime giggles!
104. Knock! Knock!
Who is there?
Armageddon.
Armageddon who?
Armageddon a little tired. Let's get some sleep.
105. Knock, knock!
Who is it?
Earl.
Earl who?
Earl be glad to go to bed.
106. Knock! Knock!
Who is outside?
Egg.
Egg who?
Eggstremely tired and sleepy.
107. Knock, knock!
Who is it?
Lee.
Lee who?
Lee me alone I'm tired!
108. Knock! Knock!
Who is there?
Pasta.
Pasta who?
Pasta bedtime.
109. Knock! Knock!
Who knocks?
Hugo.
Hugo who?
Hugo to bed right now!
110. Knock! Knock!
Who is it?
Alison.
Alison who?
Alison to you snore every night.
111. Knock, knock!
Who is there?
Justin.
Justin who?
Justin time for bed.
112. Knock, knock!
Who is it?
Godfrey.
Godfrey who?
Godfrey mattress with the bed I bought.
113. Knock! Knock!
Who is there?
Bean.
Bean who?
Bean a while since I got a good night's sleep.
Here at Kidadl, we have carefully created lots of great family-friendly jokes for everyone to enjoy! If you liked our suggestions for Sleep Jokes then why not take a look at Breakfast Puns, or Knight Puns?
Source: https://kidadl.com/funnies/jokes/best-sleep-jokes-that-arent-tired
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